Does Richard Armitage Have a Girlfriend or not?

Ahhh….what a handsome hunk of a man!  Anyway, I got the idea for this post from one of Richard Armitage fan blogs that I enjoy visiting.  Many fans seem to feel that Richard would keep having a girlfriend a secret to protect his privacy and not have to answer any questions.   I love that Richard Armitage is a private person.  That may seem strange since he has chosen a very public career.  Some people may think that actors are not entitled to have their own private lives and should expect the public to pry.  I don’t think that at all.  Acting is a career choice and at the end of the day I feel that actors are entitled to go home without the prying eyes of the public.

In Richard’s case, there is much speculation about whether or not he is in a relationship.  It really isn’t anyone’s business, but as a huge fan I can understand the interest by so many women.  We really cannot help it…LOL   After I saw Richard for the first time in BBC North & South I went online to find out more about him; including his marital status.  A girl can dream can’t she?  :-)

Richard Armitage seems to be a very private person when it comes to talking about his personal life.  I respect that and I do believe that is the best choice that he can make for himself. However, to me, not giving details about your relationship is not the same as pretending altogether that you are not in one.  Does this mean that when Richard gets married he is going to also pretend that he isn’t?

Why can’t Richard have a girlfriend or wife and the two of them commence with their relationship like anyone else while Richard simply keeps details of it off-limits.  Richard Armitage is not the first handsome actor the world has ever known and will not be the last.  Many male celebrities who have huge female fans the world over are in relationships.  What makes Richard so different that he needs to hide away a girlfriend if he has one?  If during an interview Richard is asked if he has a girlfriend and he does, what is wrong with him saying yes?  I think it is a normal question to ask and does not constitute prying.  Asking for details of your relationship is a whole other story and that is where I can understand RA would want to draw the line.  But having a girlfriend is not a crime or a top-secret event that needs to be hidden for the sake of privacy.  Richard can have a relationship that people know about without inviting the world in.  It is done all the time by other celebrities.

Richard recently experienced meeting Prince William, Duke of Cambridge at the London Hobbit premiere.  For the British that is huge.  If there was a love of his life why would she not be there?  I just cannot picture Richard having a woman in his life and saying “I am going to meet Prince William tonight while attending the premier of one of the greatest movies I will ever make.  I will tell you all about it when I get home.”  Why would she not have been standing behind Richard with his mother when he met Prince William?  Peter Jackson had his wife and children there.  Leaving a significant other at home during significant times of your life simply does not make sense to me.  Granted, I don’t know the man, but I like to believe that if Richard had a love of his life now he would proudly have taken her to the London premiere of The Hobbit.  Other actors in The Hobbit were with their spouses and girlfriends.
If Richard Armitage does have a girlfriend, I see no  logical reason he would feel the need to hide her or pretend that he does not have one.  From my viewpoint it just ain’t that serious.

Your Charming Comments

  1. Danielle says

    What a lovely, refreshing blog! I became a fan of Richard armitage after seeing him in the first Hobbit movie. I am not in the army with his name. I believe he is a great talent, and under appreciated by Hollywood up until now. That is changing I’m sure. As for his love life, it’s his personal domain. I agree with most of the comments here, he does seem to prefer women, is single, and is no longer with this capper lady. I can’t see him with her, I don’t know why…I think he’s just really career focused now. As far as his more rabid fans, i believe they might see themselves as protective of him, and yet it is an illusion. He’s just a normal dude who happens to be tall and handsome, and who acts as a profession. He strikes me as a serious professional, with an attitude of someone who loves their work and is willing to give it their best.
    I am shy too, at times, and if I saw him at a fan event would feel very awkward asking for an autograph or picture. I’d rather just tell him (if I dared) that I enjoyed his performance(in a play for example). It would still feel odd, but that’d be more polite and less invasive than snapping pictures of him.

    • says

      Hello Danielle,

      Thank you for stopping by and commenting. I fell for Mr. Armitage after watching North and South. I loved him onscreen with Daniella Denby-Ashe and wished that in real life they would hook up. Have you seen North and South?

      When I first became a fan in January of 2012 I was extremely smitten. I still love RA and will always be a fan of his, but over the past few months my extreme enthusiasm over him has completely disappeared. So much so that a g few days ago I was considering removing the Richard Armitage tab on the top of my blog and putting it on the sidebar. Well, it was bound to happen at some point. I do have a life of my own, and it is simply not productive spending so much time pining over a movie star that I do not know, no matter how tall and handsome he is.

      I am bold enough to ask RA to take a picture with me, but I would not bother with the autograph. I mean what the heck would I do with it afterwards? To me they are simply dust collectors, but to each their own.

  2. Callaluna says

    WOW!!! This topic certainly does stimulate a lot of speculation.
    Here is my take on the subject.
    Richard Armitage is an ACTOR. He has worked his tail off for twenty years to get to the point he now occupies. ACTORS are by nature, self involved and introspective. I know, because I come from a family of ACTORS. Their favorite people are, ME, MYSELF, and I.
    It doesn’t mean he isn’t one of the grandest men on earth, I believe he is a true gentleman and a kind and well intentioned person. He loves his family, That speaks to me.
    Right now, he would be working against himself if he became entangled with someone who hindered his career, since the ultimate goal of any dedicated ACTOR is to achieve the greatest amount of success possible.
    I believe his relationship with Ms. Capper fizzled when she became disenchanted with his career path and huge success in “The Hobbit”. But just this past January, they appeared together in a production of Proust at the 92nd Street Y in NYC. They remain friends, and who knows, perhaps she is re-thinking her position on his career. I WOULD!
    Recently, he has also been linked to Idina Menzel, which seems like the strangest coupling ever, but to each his own.
    Our favorite man is currently filming a movie in Leeds, England, and is set to star in “The Crucible” on the London stage with a young girl named Sara Colley who is 23 and fresh out of Oxford. This is her very first professional role..lucky girl.
    ACTORS have lots of relationships with lots of people because they are always moving about, doing films and plays. When I was in the theater, I had lots of boyfriends, but none of them lasted. It can be the nature of the business. Remember as well, these people are always doing love scenes with the most beautiful men and women in the world. Say what you will, it poses a real danger to personal relationships, ask Jennifer Aniston.
    As for the “gay” rumours, he has stated time and again he is not gay. Let’s take him at his word. I believe it’s wishful thinking on the part of some gays and who can blame them? Bi-sexual? Many, many, actors are. I dated a few myself back in pre-history.
    I love this man as an ACTOR, and wish him all the best success, he has earned it. When HE is ready, I’m sure he will handle his love-life with as much grace and class as he does his career.
    I do so hope we get him as Matthew in ADOW. Perhaps that’s why he isn’t committing to long term engagements on the stage or in film, he’s hoping for it as well. As always Xenia, your blog attracts the nicest folks. Love it here and wish you many blessings as always.

    • says

      Hi Callaluna,

      I agree with a lot of what you wrote. You stated that actors are self involved, and I do believe that, and I never thought for a second that Richard Armitage was any different in that respect. However, if you say that on any of the other blogs that focus only on RA, you are likely to get “beat up”. A lot of his fans only want to believe that RA is some sort of reluctant actor. They believe that he is humble to the point where he doesn’t have an ME, ME, ME bone in his body. Or that he is some painfully shy man who needs his fans to protect him from the hungry wolves. Gimme me a break, even I am not that naive.

      I do see RA as a humble man to a certain degree. As you wrote, he is a gentleman and generally a very nice man. That does not mean that he cannot possibly be self involved. I feel that all actors, to some degree, are self involved. Some would point out that he does not even have his own website as proof that he is not self involved. I say so what? Lots of actors don’t have a website.

      RA is a grown man who has been making his own decisions (some not so smart ones) in order to become a household name in the world of acting. At one point even RA said himself that he was becoming discouraged when after so many years he still had not hit it big in acting.

      As far as Ms. Capper goes, I figured that she was more serious than he was. The most important thing to RA is acting. I am sure he would love to have a relationship, but he is not ready, even at age 42 to put any woman before that. At this point it could be that he has been single for so long that it may be challenging for him to settle down. A relationship comes with its own demands, and time with your love interest ranks high on the list.

      I do not see RA is being a man who is interested in dating just for dating sake.

      I did not know that he has denied being gay. Never the less I did not think he was to begin with. Not that he would be any less of a person in my eyes if he was.

      I had not heard that he was linked to Idina Menzel. I don’t take that bit of news seriously at all. Btw, Idina was married to actor Taye Diggs for 10 years. They have a son and recently separated a few months ago. No word yet about any official divorce.

      I am not holding my breath for RA to get married ever. If it happens that would be wonderful, but quite frankly I would be surprised. I know that he says he would like to get married and have children, but I am not getting a sense that the titles husband and father are holding any sense of a very important life goal.

      I DO hope he gets the part of Matthew Clairmont!!!

      • Callaluna says

        I also agree with much of what you have said as well.
        I have to say, people in their 40′s today seem much younger than when I was in mine.
        I won’t say when that was, but if 60 is the new 40, then it follows that 40 is the new 20!
        It just about broke my heart when Idina Menzel and Taye Diggs broke up, they were such a beautiful couple, but he is rumoured to have a roving eye, which kind of speaks to my comment about actors. love scenes, temptation and personal relationships.
        I agree with you that RA may never marry, but I hope his life is happy nonetheless. Some folks are not cut out for marriage and know it, I am one of them. Still, one wishes for a loving relationship with a faithful partner, emphasis on faithful!
        Hope your studies are going well and you finish your degree with ease! It is so much fun to have these discussions, even if it’s a bit bizarre to be as “involved” with RA since we have no idea what he is really like. I hope he is just as I imagine, wouldn’t that be sweet?
        Blessings!

  3. Jenn says

    It’s not about the body language but more the things you “sense” from vids or interviews, I guess? It’s diff to explain, really. But, you know, this topic alone would fill a multiple page long essay. Would be interesting to write and read, tho. :-) If I had a blog, maybe I would sit down and write… just for fun what comes out of it.

    Xenia, thank you for welcoming me! Daniela Denby-Ashe is indeed a very lovely person! :-) But as long as he falls in love with a down-to-earth girl who loves him for being Richard and not one of his characters/or his job I’m good with it.

  4. Jenn says

    My two cents are: RA is into women – based only on my own observations and conclusions. I know men who aren’t in relationships and are totally fine with it and not weird at all. We are living in a meant-to-be-single-world. I could guess – and here, I kinda agree with chris – RA strikes me as a person who is “all or nothing”. Why waste energy, time, emotions etc on something that won’t last anyway (meaning casual dating)? Why not rather wait for the right woman? But that’s a very romantic thinking, I know, waiting for the one in the shiny armour (or in his case, a silky gown) and all that.

    I could imagine RA is in a serious relationship. But I have to agree with Xenia, if he is he wouldn’t hide her. That would be unfair to her and to their relationship. Besides that, we are not talking about J. Bieber here. I assume, his fandom know life and would deal with the fact he is taken. Of course, there are always the slightly crazy ones.

    Hope, my comment isn’t too late – great topic!

    • says

      I agree with Chris too. RA does not strike me as a man who is into casual dating. It seems to me that since there isn’t anyone who truly floats his boat at the moment, he just doing his own thing until he does. I used to wish that he would fall in love with Daniela Denby-Ashe, and vice versa. She is the only woman that I would give him up for….LOL

      No, your comment is not too late. I always love it when people stop by and comment, no matter when it happens. Thank you for stopping by Jenn. :-)

      • chris says

        Jenn and Xenia Hi the both of you !!! What are does observations about him being attracted to women ? I am curious. As much as his body language is staggering I also find him hard to read. What have you both observed . Take care…

  5. chris says

    Me again ! One question you forget to answer you said that per your observations you were pretty certain he was into women ( I think so too) What did you observe with regards to that ? Good luck with school !!

    • says

      My observations about RA being into women is simply a conclusion I came to from my general observations of him. I did not use any particular thing or instance to come to that decision.

      • chris says

        OK, fair enough. I still think he would unleash a feeding frenzy by saying he had someone in his life as opposed to being quiet about it but I see your point. As per his attraction to women, I just wanted a concrete example of something you saw that made you feel that way. There are certainly plenty of rumours buzzing about him…. Be well.

  6. chris says

    Yeah !! I got an answer !! First of all thank you and sorry for the mess I made on your lovely page… My name is Chris and I am a new fan of Mr Armitage since November 2013. Must say that I find the “fandom” more interesting than the man himself ( OK maybe not ;-) ) Have been lurking around and reading blogs and posts and boy some people take things very seriously…Your blog as well as 2 others are the only ones I “dare” post in. So congrats on your blog ! My 2 cents worth on the relationship ” issue”. Maybe he is not good at them, maybe he is waiting for “The One”.He does not strike me as someone who would settle for anything less than true love. He certainly does not seem to be into casual relationships. All or nothing kind of guy.is if he does not meet someone perfect for him he would rather be a!one.Plus he does not want to date actresses or anyone famous so where do you find this ” gem” who will love you for who you are ? He seems to have a crazy schedule. As for showing up with a significant other at a premiere, I do not think so… Knowing what I think I know of the man (which is not much obviously), he seems to be caring and very protective of his feelings and his privacy as well as that of his family and friends. I do not think he would bring someone and let her standing there like a “potted plant ” while he is being photographed to death and while he is signing autographs.I would hate it myself. He would feel she was being exposed to all sorts of potential crap. Being stared or sneered at or judged (too fat,too skinny,too ugly etc….) He would feel terrible involving someone he loves in that kind of circus.It happened a few years back when he was photographed with that lady (who may or may not have been his gf we cannot know) and apparently she was ‘brutalized” something awful by some of his “fans”. Terrible… Just be happy for him. There you go Xenia… Thank you for your time and I apologize in advance for my English (it is not my first language. Be well and hoping I will get your opinion on my gigantic post.
    I

    • says

      Your English is great, so do not worry about that.

      I have to stick to my belief that if RA had a girlfriend he would take her with him to share in every special moment of his life, just as he takes his parents. When he is on the red carpet she would probably not be with him so that he can take care of his work obligations, but I remain steadfast that he would not deliberately hide her away from the public. That is a whole other story. I believe that he would not allow interviews to focus on him talking about her, but I do believe that if asked, and he did have a girlfriend he would admit to it.

      The lady you are referring to is Annabel Caper who is, herself, an actress. No matter who RA dates, many of his fans are going to criticize her based on jealousy, and that is unfortunate.

  7. Ingrid says

    Hi,Xenia
    RA is such a charming man that almost all of his female fans want to know about his marital.But maybe we should not pry this cause every one has his secrets.If we love him,we should respect him.Well…I think he has a gf,to be honest.After all,he is not young…Or…he has a bf?Aha!

        • chris says

          Hi Xenia !! What are your observations ? Just curious… Love it here, feels like a safe place to give an opinion or ask for one…..Thank you !

          • says

            Hi Chris,

            I apologize for taking so long to respond. I am completing my degree, so much classes are very challenging. I really need to take some time to write some posts and reply to comments.

            My observations is that RA does NOT have a girlfriend. I do not believe that he would go through the trouble of hiding her from the public if he did, as so many of his fans seem to believe. Quite frankly, I don’t even see what the big deal is. If RA had a special gal in his life he certainly would not be the first nor only handsome actor that ever did.

            I also think that it is entirely possible that RA is not the greatest at navigating love relationships. He seems to be more in love with, and married to his acting career, but if I were to say that in other groups I would be attacked, and again, I do not see what the big deal his. I love RA, but he is a human being. Granted an extremely handsome one, but human never the less, and if he is not perfect, I still love and except anyway.

        • chris says

          I do not see my post anymore….. Hi new person here… Like your blog. Feels safe here.. Just curious as to want your observations were.Very new fan and did not know about this topic concerning Mr.Armitage..

  8. Maria says

    It’s amazing to me how everyone is trying to figure out if RA has a girlfriend or not.. I have to say all of the posts above are really good. As a huge RA fan, I have to ask why is it that people find it strange that he’s not in a relationship.. I don’t see anything wrong with that. Just because he’s in his forties and hasn’t found someone yet, doesn’t make him odd. There are lots of men/women in their 30′s and 40′s who aren’t in a relationship and their not odd or weird.. The right person just hasn’t come along yet. Chances are RA probably hasn’t found what he’s looking for. Especially now that he’s famous world over,it must be that much more difficult to find someone who likes you for you, and not the fame and fortune.

  9. Unknown says

    God, I just hope he doesn’t have a girlfriend because he’s queer :D. A guy can dream, can’t he?^^
    I mean it’s not only his physical appearance, it’s also his attitude, his skills and (of course) his voice…damn!!!

  10. Felicia says

    Just stumbled on this. Honestly, I thought that auburn-haired woman in the gray coat (behind him in one of the photos) was his girlfriend! (I’ve seen photos of them together.) Guess I guessed wrong.

  11. pickle says

    Maybe he’s single or gay. Y does it matter? Being in a relationship with someone is a private matter. Y should he answer yes or no? Its not relevant and its none of other ppls business.

    • says

      Hi Pickle,

      It doesn’t matter and that is exactly my point. Many of his fans seem to think that RA would jump through hoops to hide a girlfriend. What is the big deal? I don’t think RA would hide it.

  12. P. says

    o, and if the girlfriend question is considered touchy in the RA community, I guess I just threw a bomb in there with my “he could very well be bisexual” remark… oops :-p
    I don’t care if he’s gay, bi, straight, single or married, as long as he’s happy, keeps following his heart, stays true to himself and gets the opportunity to play interesting parts on screen, tv and stage. And I don’t care what those Armitage Army ladies think either, as it’s more than a bit awkward to me that they bother him after events for autographs, pictures etc., and send him all sorts of weird letters and presents. Leave the man alone, he finds interviews difficult enough without finding a horde of hysterical 45+ women at the exit after.

  13. P. says

    He told a journalist for a written Spooks S8 interview he was “recently single”. That was October 2009. In another written interview, December 2012, he again said that he was single. As he has been working constantly between those two moments, most of it abroad as well (RH3, Strike Back, 18 months in NZ for The Hobbit, plus all the Hobbit promo trips and a stay in America for Black Sky), I really don’t see him having found a new girlfriend in those years. And while he does strike me as a very private person (with a public job like his he obviously needs to make a conscious effort to keep his private life exactly that, but he also seems very private and introvert by nature), he doesn’t seem the kind of man to me that would take his mum (I even think his Dad was there too, he mentioned that somewhere) to the premiere with Prince William and not his partner. Or who would lie about his relationship status. So, my deduction is that he is single :-) I’m sure that when he settles down, he’ll make some woman (or indeed man, who says he can’t be bisexual?) very happy.
    Btw he did admit to being very shy. It comes across in interviews very clearly, he doesn’t like to draw attention to himself as a person or to his acting in any glorifying way (and gets endearingly awkward when people point out to him his success or fanbase). I don’t think he lacks self-esteem at all, he is just modest about himself and his achievemements to the point of shyness. I find that very refreshing, there are too many movie stars with huge inflated Egos as it is. I find it also rather European (compared to American actors European ones tend to be more down to earth and humble about fame in general).
    As for btween the sheets; I get a strong feeling he was not doing so well yet back then, and was not in any luxury to say “no” to substantial roles like that. I found the whole series rather disappointing to be honest, but it was fun watching him being still a young, unknown actor (including crooked teeth lol). The nudity was a bit corny (that background music…), but as a European viewer it didn’t bother me in any way nor did it lessen my feelings of the kind of intelligent, sensitive and humble man RA, to me, is.

    • says

      Hi,

      Thank you for stopping by and commenting. I agree with you about the girlfriend thing. I don’t believe that Richard had another girlfriend between the time he broke up with his girlfriend in 2009 and now. While RA is private I don’t believe that he would deliberately hide a girlfriend so that no one knows. That is just too silly and it just isn’t that serious. I certainly don’t believe that RA would take his Mum to an important premiere and not have his girlfriend there too.

      Watching RA in BTS did not lessen my feelings for him either. There are some things I wouldn’t do to further my career or for money, but the line that each of us will not cross is different for all of us. I guess that BTS was not cheesy enough for Richard to refuse and for some reason I find that hysterically funny…LOL

      • Jane says

        Well, when I said he had a girlfriend a few years ago he did never give her name and took his agent to the Baftas instead of her. And even earlier, he said he was single and then admitted that he has seen a woman for a year. So he certainly has a history of being secretive about his relationships. I also think he could very well have dated someone in London or in NZ, but it didn’t last.

        • P. says

          He said he was single, but dating. The two aren’t mutually exclusive. It was obvious that at that point they had had a few dates, but she wasn;t the special someone in his life yet. He dated Anne Capper since early 2005, but they only became a couple after he finished on RH series 1 late 2006. He just didn’t want to mention her name when their relationship was still so new and fragile. He said this himself in that interview from I think September 2006. I can totally understand that. He never hid anything, he admitted he was dating in 2005, but also that this person (we now now was Ms. Capper) wasn’t the special someone yet. I think he was being very open there, not hiding the fact he wasn’t sure yet about his feelings for this lady, but admitting that he was dating. Dating is the stage before a relationship, so him calling himself still single at that time makes perfect sense to me. I don’t believe for one second he a) has had the time to build any long-term relationship since he broke up with her in 2009, and b) that he is the kind of person who would go out of his way to hide any new love in his life. He is always open and honest in interviews, even when it makes him feel shy and awkward.

          Anyway, I don’t feel he has a “history of being secretive about relationships” at all. And bringing his agent to a red carpet do doesn’t mean a thing. He said he hates attending these events so it’s no big deal (as in, a very special occasion) for him, and his girlfriend was a dancer so maybe she didn’t feel like going, or she had to perform that evening? I do think The Hobbit premiere in London was very special to him, and that, if he had a girlfriend, he would have certainly brought her, along with his parents.

          He seems the most honest man so I don;t believe he’s hiding anything. He’s totally focussed on his career it seems, and with good reason too as it’s been a rollercoaster ride for him these past years. And I can only hope he finds a nice, down to earth, funny, woman to share his life with in the future and maybe have kids with. He sure seems like he’d make a great dad!

          And why this would be touchy in the Armitage Army community, or whatever they call themselves, is beyond me. These particular ladies seem very very posessive of him, it creeps me out to be honest…

          • says

            Hello P.

            I agree with much of what you wrote. I don’t see RA as ever trying to hide that he is dating someone. I also do not believe that he has focused on his personal life enough to have had a relationship with anyone since his girlfriend moved out of his house. RA has been super focused on his career. There is no doubt in my mind that if RA had a girlfriend she would have been with him at the London premiere of The Hobbit. I don’t want to offend anyone, but to suggest that RA would deliberately not bring her to hide being in a relationship is simply ridiculous to me. I do not see a history of RA being secretive, but I think that if he is not in a relationship and has not been in one in a while he would not want to discuss that. I think that is the reason why he now simply says he is single when asked about his relationship status and does not elaborate.

            I know that RA says he would like to have children some day, but I am not convinced that being a father is essential to him. Of course I could be wrong, but I just do not get the impression that fatherhood is a burning desire for him. I think that he can take it or leave it and if that is true, so what? I don’t think it is a horrible thing, but I know many women who are obsessed with him want so much for him to become a father. It is RA’ s life not ours.

            The possessiveness is off the chain at times with some individuals. Richard Armitage is a grown man over forty, and is not being victimized like some naive teenager. He chose a career that puts you in the limelight and that, to me, says that to some degree, even if it is just a tiny one, you enjoy attention. This idea seems to be a very difficult thing for many of his fans to absorb. Instead he is being painted like some shy guy who does not want to be noticed. Are you kidding me? Then why is he an actor. I think what may be more true is that RA is not so comfortable talking about himself to others. He is more comfortable being someone else (the characters he portrays) to an audience or talking about the projects that he is working on.

          • P. says

            HI Xenia,

            I don’t go to any RA forums or blogs usually, because of the extreme posessiveness and nastiness of some of his hardcore fans. I’ve tried it, and ran away screaming after a short while to be honest. Anyway, I stumbled upon this post a while ago and I totally agreed that he’s probably just happy to be single for the time being. I don’t get the social stigma that being over a certain age and still single seems to hold these days. I guess that;s why many fans seem to want to insist in thinking he’s got a girlfriend, but is hiding her in his loft :-) Like not having one would make a 40+ attractive man a weirdo. Take one look at his career and work schedule over the past few years, and then him being single does not seem strange at all. How on earth do you build a long-term relationship when you’re not even in the country for most of the year? He seems very focused on his career, I get the feeling partly because it’s just taking him on a fast ride since Robin Hood and one job has followed another relentlessly (and saying no is difficult in his profession. Many actors, even famous ones, have this fear of work drying up on them). But also partially because he seems to be a bit of a workaholic, I mean that positively, as in a man with a very strong work ethic.

            I was interested to read that you think becoming a father isn’t the main priority in his life now, nor is dating. I totally agree. I do think he wants to become a father, and to me he would seem the type of guy that would make a great, creative, caring, fun dad. But he’s also stated that he was a bit scared that he was just a little too selfish with his career to be a dad just yet. And that feeling “broody” (his words :-) had more to do with his brother having a baby then with a very pressing desire on his own part to have children. I think the time needs to be right for him, and that he feels it isn’t yet. His career demands too much attention, and he’s loving those opportunities too much right now. I can totally understand that, after him having to slog for so many years to even get smaller roles. I don’t see him putting everything on hold to find the right lady to have a child with at this moment.There’s too much going on for him now. I do hope he doesn’t leave it too long though, only to discover at 50 that he’s got a whopping career but no personal life. He does seem to be a loner, meaning he functions fine on his own and doesn’t need to constantly be in a relationship to be happy. But eventually, even loners need love like everybody else, I bet even he gets a bit lonely in all those hotel rooms sometimes. It’s a strange life he’s leading at the moment, great opportunities, but they come with a cost to ones private life. I think he realises that fully.

            He does seem rather to have rather mixed feelings about acting/being an actor. Wanting it (acting great parts) but not necessarily enjoying not all of it’s side effects (fame/fans). Many actors are shy, it’s a common misconception that being shy excludes being able to perform on stage/screen. He seems to like disappearing in a role that is far removed from his own self, which is exactly why acting holds an attraction for shy people. So I wouldn’t say he can’t be shy because he’s an actor. That would mean his awkwardness and shyness are a facade, a false modesty. That makes no sense whatsoever to me, and he seems much too genuine for that.

            It’s fun to analyze to this extend, but on the other hand this is exactly why I avoid fan sites. People get so over the top offended or hysterical about topics like this, like he’s their private pet project and nobody gets to touch that. But it’s fun chatting to you about it, I got the feeling we both have the same view on the girlfriend thing. I bet in 5 years time or so, when the Hobbit craze has settled and he’s probably back in the UK (I don’t see him living in LA really, not for an extended period of time. Too much about fakeness and big egos) he’ll find a nice girlfriend/wife and maybe even have a child. He said he doesn’t want to be an old dad, but he seems very young at heart so I don’t see why not. It a luxury only men have, postponing having children.

            Personally I find it so refreshing, a good-looking man in his early 40′s, who’s making it as an actor but who just admits not having had the most interesting lovelife. There’s such a social stigma on being single past a certain age. I admire how he just admits it, and even admitting not having had many long relationships and being a late developer in some areas of life in the past. He’s a late bloomer and good for him for being ok with that. You can’t deny who you are and he seems very true to himself, even about the bits of his character that he perhaps doesn’t love.

            …….ok this post wasn’t supposed to be this long, sorry :-p

          • says

            Oh, please do not ever apologize for a long comment. I enjoyed reading what you have to say. Most people who visit my blog NEVER comment, so I am always thankful when anyone takes the time to do so.

            I admit that many of the RA fans blogs I do not visit because of the extreme possessiveness. If you make a comment that can be even remotely construed as a criticism of RA you can get your butt kicked. There is one RA fan blog that I stopped visiting because I felt as if I was being taken to task way too much and it seemed as if the blog owner had her clique of followers. I felt like an “outsider” most of the time. I really don’t have a problem if a blog owner has a clique of followers. I am happy for that blog owner. Lots of a blogs of all types have faithful followers. It is kind of a mark of success as a blogger. My problem is when it seems that I cannot have an opinion that is not in line with everyone else’s and I get “attacked”. For instance I have posted before on another blog my observations about RA having children, the exact same view that I shared here. I know that RA said he would like to be a father some day and I believe him, of course. However, I get the impression that while he would like to be a father, it is not a pressing goal. If RA were never to have any children I think he would accept that just fine too. Why can I not express this view without being attacked? Yes, it would be nice for RA to have children and spread those gorgeous genes, but that would be his fans goal for him. Let RA lead his own life. I have always wanted to be a mother, but I did not have any children simply because I always wanted to be married first. Now, I am over forty-five and there is no way that I want to start having children now. I have to say also that the longer you go without children the more you become used to life without them. It was difficult, but I did finally resign myself to not having any children. It will, however, remain one of the things I always wanted and failed at accomplishing. RA could decide as he nears 50 that he will forgo parenthood as well and that is his right.

            I would get the same negative reaction whenever I said I doubt RA has had a serious relationship since the gal moved out. Why is that? The man is never seen with a woman at any events (except female publicists). He has been working back to back and traveling all over the globe. Why can it not be true that he has not been in a relationship since 2009? I think it is totally possible and probably more true than not. The idea that he is secretly seeing someone and deliberately keeping her hidden is sheer nonsense to me.

            I also once said that RA is probably not that great at relationships and that got me in deep crap trouble too. I am not great at relationships because I am shy with men on that level. I can have great friendships with men, but when it comes to being a girlfriend I get so shy and self conscious about myself. If one is really paying attention to what RA says in interviews he has admitted to having personality traits that can make being in a relationship difficult. He has said that he is a loner, prefers his own space and is moody. He has also alluded to being a bit of a penny pincher. These are all things that can make being in a relationship with him challenging. It does not make him a bad person either. I am not a bad person just because I am not great at relationships. Many of his fans want to make him out to be Mr. Perfect. I am completely bowled over by Mr. Arimtage,but I am not delusional about him.

            I still maintain that people who become actors enjoy attention and I have to include RA in that. On some deep level you do. An artist of any type (acting, painting, musicians) does not want to became one so they can remain in a closet. I think that I am actually going to write about this today on my blog. Thanks for the inspiration. :-)

          • P. says

            I’m quite relieved to read your very sensible observations. I share most of them, like I said. Not the craving of attention though, I believe acting has it’s own merit, even without an audience and that he seems to love doing it it for it’s own sake (the immersion in the character), not because he is being watched when doing it or gets attention because of it. He said somewhere that his dream job was one where he could act and then leave the studio and never be recognised at all (or something to that extend). That does not sound like someone who craves attention. He craves the rush of losing oneself when playing someone else, the thrill of feeling the fear of getting in front of the camera/on stage but still doing it (he said it was like parachute jumping from an airplane), and the in-depth research and emotional fleshing out of a character.

            I am also amazed by how a lot of the Army-style fans (I get the feeling only the die hard ones call themselves Armitage Army but I might be wrong there) react when confronted with observations like the ones we discussed here.

            He strikes me as a very introvert, shy person, a loner who finds relationships slightly difficult and living together with someone even more so (he did say something to that extend in an older interview) too. Part of me likes him so much because those are traits I share with him. I’m a bright, fun, creative person, but introvert (not shy though) and a loner myself. Finding a partner that fits with that personality/lifestyle isn’t that easy. Plus, it means that I’m not completely desperate to ditch my single status either, unlike most single 30+ women I know. I can function perfectly fine and pretty happily as a single women and need a lot of space and time on my own. I get the feeling that, between the crazy work hours he makes in his job (I mean, starting at 5am and getting home at 8pm doesn’t leave a lot of private time for oneself, let alone a partner), he needs his space too and doesn’t go out of his way to trawl around for a potential girlfriend. He even strikes me as a bit nerdy and awkward with the ladies,like you hinted, but that’s just a personal observation based on the written interviews and tv appearances. I somehow don’t see him going up to a beautiful woman in a bar and chatting her up with his amazing romantic lines :-p

            I have been booed off an RA fansite in the past, about something so incredibly harmless and minor that I was quite appalled by the way these what appeared to be well-spoken, older ladies suddenly ganged up on me to be honest. I never offended anyone (I am by no means some troll or rude person the internet seems to be full off. I can come across as a bit blunt but that’s just because I’m Dutch. We call it being honest :-) , I just made my own opinion/observation over something minor (not even The Girlfriend or any “hot RA topic”) tand got, shall we say, a firm reprimand. It felt as though I’d failed in Armitage Canon Class, pretty bizar if you ask me. It made me a bit sad as I read a message where he himself asked the fans to look out for one another and be respecful. I don’t think he has a clue what is being said on the web, as I bet (and almost hope) that he avoids the RA fan forums like the plague, but I think the intolerant attitude of a lot of his fans would sadden him, being the kind, respecful bloke I think he is.

            Anyway, I agree with you that he most likely has been single for a good while now (I think since The Girlfriend moved out), without a secret girlfriend hidden in his shed/loft/closet/boot of his car (it is roomy enough though, being a BMW :-), and that becoming a father could go either way for him and doesn;t seem to be his Life Goal, at least not at this time. And that’s perfectly ok, it’s his life (but if you read some fans comments you’d think he’s not a man but a breeding horse who’s good genes NEED to be passed o. Yaiks :-S ). I have some time left to think about having children, but for me it’s the same way. I don’t need to be married, but I would want to be in a stable relationship. If not, so be it, I can live with that as well. I’m not even 100% sure I even want children of my own at this point, but if the right man comes along, who knows. It’s just a shame us ladies don’t have time to spare when it comes to these decisions.

            Anyway,it’s refreshing and fun to read your view on these things. Your the first fellow-fan I can have a sensible conversation with (and even disagree with on some points, who knew that was a possibility in Armitage Land? lol) about this quite wonderful man without being shunned :-) Please forgive my English btw, I try to pay attention to spelling but I’m too lazy to look everything up.

            I look forward to your post about the craving attention thing. Even though I’ll probably disagree ;-)

            P.

          • says

            P, your English is great!

            I never said that RA craves attention. I said that as an actor on some level he does enjoy it. That is different, in my mind anyway, than craving attention, but you are welcomed to disagree with me anyway….LOL

            You know, I have some of the same traits as RA. I love my space and in a way I am a loner. I love to go off by myself to read or write. At the same time I love connecting with people via blogging and other creative endeavors in real life where I live. The loner part can be a problem in a relationship. Many people (men as well as women) love being joined at the hip in relationships. I am so not like that. I can love a man with all my heart and not feel like we should be attached like Siamese twins. To me that is not love.

            I have gotten great support from certain RA fan blogs and it means so much to me, so I make it a point to give support back. There really are some very nice people in the RA fandom. When you do come across any that are mean spirited that simply means it is not a place to return to. I have had to learn that lesson for myself. I will not make room for negativity in my life.

            I have no problem with people stating their own thoughts, even if they are different from mine as long as it is done without putting me down.

          • P. says

            OK then I think I misunderstood you, I thought you meant that becoming an actor (or a singer, or a painter or any artist profession for that matter) means that these people must crave the public attention they get from doing that job. I still don’t think RA loves, or even enjoys, the attention on him as a person because of his job/career, or even on him as an actor (though he seems to be able to bare that to a greater extend and seems happy to discuss films/roles). I have a strong feeling he just had to learn to deal with it, as it grew bigger with his career blossoming, It seems to me he’s still adjusting and learning how to behave and negotiate all the demands for attention he receives nowadays, now even more than ever. He still fumbles and touches his face though when he’s feeling shy :-). I really hope he never becomes a media savvy celeb. Let him stay his shy, slightly old-fashioned and nerdy self, I like him too much that way.

            As for relationships and becoming like conjoined twins, that’s not for me either. I really need my own space, and find a live-in partner pretty exhausting for that reason (also, Dutch homes are rather small, which doesn’t help…). Living apart together works best for me and I was never the type of girl/woman to completely melt into the life of her boyfriend and merging everything. He seems the kind of guy that needs his own space, to not wash in and mess up as he pleases without some woman nagging :-) I think he’s still figuring out what kind of woman and relationship fits with his lifestyle, job and personality. He’ll find someone though, I’m pretty sure of that. But he won’t rush into it, like he said, he’s very careful and cautious when it comes to love. And a bit shy probably ;-)

            And I never meant all of the fans out there are horrible, not at all. I’ve had some really nice chats as well, but on the bigger forums (I do regularly visit some sites, for info and updates) I did feel very, I don’t know, inspected, I guess. Tested on my knowledge (and god forbid if you get it “wrong”). It’s just not for me, I liked posting here and reading your answers, but participating in a forum discussion with multiple long-term and often pretty hardcore fans just wasn’t for me. I felt I had to mince my words the whole time, that I had to tread carefully. Plus I don’t really feel a very urgent need to discuss everything RA with loads of other fans.

            I did find it refreshing to read your posts though, as they are a lot more common sense and down-to-earth than a lot of stuff posted by smitten fans. I’m very down-to-earth myself, I guess that’s what I like a lot about RA as well. Funny enough he seems very “Dutch” to me somehow. He’s tall (we have the tallest guys on the planet here, so he’s of pretty average height to me :-)), very grounded and very, well, normal. We Dutchies have a very Protestant “act normal, don’t ask for any special attention and never think you’re above the rest in any way” streak that I feel Northeners from the UK share (as well as Scandinavians and Germans btw, and probably the Scottish too). And he comes across as a Northener to me, even though he wasn’t raised there (his parents were though). He has that grounded “realness”, honesty and lack of ego that most Dutch, like myself, share and appreciate in others. I hope that never changes and he “keeps things real”. He said that that was how things always should be, and I can’t agree more. He’s some guy isn’t he?

            Anyway, that last bit was very off-topic. Any forum moderator would have kicked me off by now, lol. Will read your new post tomorrow by the way!

            P.

            PS on the topic of girlfriends: I thought that the press-person that shos up in quite a few photos and clips of Hobbit premieres was his girfriend at first! She’s a slender, blond woman who often wears a floppy black hat and sunglasses. But she’s his press minder (or whatever they call those people who tell famous people where to go stand/talk/sign next on red carpets and things) :-)

          • Jane says

            She is his publicist. Her name is Ruth Bernstein and she also is Kristen Stewart’s publicist. I don’t think she has much to do except making sure those events run smoothly as there is never any publicity about RA. But it means he has professional assistance when it comes to the question how to handle his “public persona” and how to involve or not involve his private relationships into his public life.

          • Jane says

            I always had a problem to believe that Ms Capper was the girlfriend mentioned before and/or the woman he lived with because in 2006 he said he is seeing a dancer he has known since they both were in Cats. That doesn’t apply to Ms Capper. I think she may be the ex-girlfriend from drama school he remained friends with. So I don’t really know what to make of their appearances together. Maybe he separated from the dancer and got together with Ms Capper and moved in with her within a short period of time or they just went out together as friends? I think a lot of things may have happened and still happen in his private life we have no clue about and he doesn’t want us to know.

  14. unknown says

    I hope he find a right new lady with no acting job, gets married, slightly naughty and loves food, and have children.

  15. astra marie says

    Hi, Xenia! I totally agree with your take on this. RA seems like a loving person, and I think it would be a contradiction to find out he had another life that he never spoke about. He doesn’t give off that kind of vibe to me. He always seems very direct and honest in his interviews.

    So one is therefore left to conclude that this man in his forties’s most significant other is his mom. I know men like that. They are just regular guys, not weird or anything, they just aren’t in a relationship.

    I hope for his sake that he is not concealing something because he doesn’t want us, his public, to know about it. What a sad way to live.

    Thanks for your honest thoughts! It’s such a touchy subject in Armitage world! LOL!

    • says

      Yes, this is a touchy subject when it concerns Richard Armitage. Some people think that Richard would bend over backwards to conceal having a girlfriend, but don’t believe that for one minute. If you are not seeing Richard with a girlfriend I think it simply means that he doesn’t have one.

  16. says

    Hi Morrighan Muse,

    Society dos expect both men and women to be married by a certain and I have to admit that even I have projected that onto Richard Armitage. Well, not so much marriage, but I expected him to at least be in a serious relationship by now.

  17. says

    Love your blog – I just have to figure out how to add it to my blogroll over on WP :-P

    I have no problems with Richard not having brought a date with him – other than his mum – to meet the Prince. I like that he keeps his private life private, whether he is seeing someone or not.

    I don’t think it’s a sign of paranoia on his part or that he’s hiding something *cough*. I have male friends who didn’t marry till they were in their mid-forties, and even didn’t start really seriously dating till then because they had crazy schedules, traveling and such. At least for men, there isn’t really a time table that they should be dating at “this time”, or be married at “this time” because otherwise, if they’re not doing either, they could be something wrong with them.

    It’s really more of society’s projections and expectations which put so much pressure on men (and women) of a certain age these days, insisting that we all get into a pre-defined box and stay there.

  18. says

    It just occurred to me that he might be bisexual or something. High profile actors, especially the ones who are considered as sex symbols, tend to hide that fact in fear of affecting their career. So, maybe he actually IS in a relationship, but given his current rising status in acting, he’s keeping it under wraps. It is as you said, we all respect his dedication to his career, and rightfully so; but attending all these events alone and being that secretive has made me a little suspicious. I love him either way and this is just a theory.

    • says

      Hi Dina,

      I guess that anything is possible. I am sure that many people have speculated about Richard’s sexuality since he has never been married and is never seen with a woman. At least not since he dated Anabel Caper. I am not sure if Richard is deliberately being secretive or simply has not been in a relationship in a while so there is nothing to talk about. I think that it is entirely possible that Richard is not as great navigating through love and relationships as he is with his career. We all have our theories.

      Thank you for stopping by and commenting.

  19. says

    I have no idea why people would even think he’s hiding anything. I guess some new fans assume someone as handsome as he has to be dating or seeing someone? I never really give it much thought. I assume that given his recent intense involvement in his acting career, he just hasn’t developed anything remotely serious on the dating scene. His energy, time, and thoughts seem to be very much otherwise occupied at present.
    I hope love hits him by surprise someday and things happen quickly. He’s old enough now to know who he is and what he needs/wants in a relationship. I’ll be curious when someone does appear on the radar, but until then I’m happy to leave him to his privacy.
    Oh, and I thought it was adorable that he brought his mother with him to meet Prince William. (Reminds you of Thornton now, doesn’t it?

    • says

      I loved that Richard brought his Mom with him to meet Prince William. I read over at other blogs people reading something else into that and I refuse to even go there. I thought it was a beautiful thing to see and it is an example of the close and supportive relationship that Richard has with his parents. If I were going to meet Barack and Michelle Obama I would certainly bring my Mom.

      Richard has not really given any signs that being in a committed relationship is very important to him. He has always given intense focus to being an actor though and it seems to be what mainly drives him. Also as you said, Richard is old enough to know who he is and what he wants in a relationship. He will soon be 42 years old. He is no spring chicken and he has been out in the world since he was 17 years old. But if I were to say these things on someone else’s blog I would be ripped to shreds. If I say anything that even remotely suggests that Richard is a human being just like the rest of us I get a beat-down. But the fact is that Richard is now what we call middle aged. He has not had any children yet even though he says he would like to be a father. Yes, I know that he said he wants to be more financially secure, but surely he has been that for a while now; especially after he did North & South. As far as we know he has only co-habitated with one woman in his life so far and that did not last long. What do these clues tell anyone? I am not saying these things as criticism, but only relating what I have observed about Richard. I get the impression that getting married and having a family is something Richard would like to do but they are not burning desires and that is not a crime. I think that if Richard ever does marry it would probably be because he was blindsided by love. The woman would be so extraordinary to him and only then would Richard shift most of his energy and focus over to his relationship with her. He would also never want to part with her and no acting job would be as important as his marriage. That is what love does. When it comes to love and relationships Richard seems to be very much like Mr. Thornton. :-) I do respect that too.

  20. says

    Has anyone mentioned that whoever met the Prince probably had to have a security / background check? That mitigates against taking any casual partner along.

    • says

      I forgot about that aspect of it but I never figured Richard would be much interested in taking a casual date. He doesn’t seem to be needy in that way. Many other men and women cannot stand to go places unless they have a date.

  21. says

    I guess I just missed all of the discussion about RA hiding a significant other. I think it highly probable that as busy as he his, there just isn’t really time for a serious relationship.

    Obviously, based on my own post, I appreciate that Richard is a private person. However, if he did have a truly special person in his life, I would think he’d behave similarly to Martin Freeman. You know, not being an open book about his private life, but taking said person to important premieres and such.

    • says

      I agree with you 100% and your own post was great. I do believe that if Richard did have a special lady in his life, while he would guard his privacy, he would take her with him to events of his life that are important. He would lead as normal a life as possible with her just as any other male celebrity does. But just about every time I say this on other blogs I get so much darned flack over it as if it was the most outrageous thing to say. Others seem to think he would not take her out anyplace so that no one sees them together and just about deny that he does have a girl. Or that she would not want to accompany him to public events. To me that goes beyond guarding your privacy, but instead more like paranoia.

  22. says

    Hi Jasmine,

    That is what I have been thinking about RA for a while. Casual dating is probably what he is doing right now considering that he just came out of a long term project (The Hobbit) and he has been flying around the world doing publicity for it. And now getting ready to return to finishing up The Hobbit. There is still a battle scene that has to be filmed.

    I was just baffled as to why so many feel that if RA is in a relationship he would put so much energy into keeping the woman in the background to avoid answering questions about her. It just is not that serious. I think that Richard Armitage can nurture a serious relationship with someone and keep the press out of his personal life without resorting to hiding her. Other male celebrities more famous than RA have done it. Besides, who would not expect RA to fall in love and get married some day?

    Yes, I am glad that RA loves curvy women. He also does not seem to be into the Hollywood starlet type. I do remember though reading an RA interview and he was described the Sarah Caulfield character as beautitul. I was a little disappointed. No disrespect to the actress who played Sarah Caulfield, but she is very anorexic looking, so I was left a bit dumbfounded when RA made that remark. Here in America people think that is beautiful but I like to think that people in other countries have more sense.

    I remember that article where RA mentions the live in girlfriend. They were together for about a year and a half. You know, it is possible that RA is not that great at relationships. I am not assuming that the breakup was his fault. I am just making a general observation. Relationships take work, time and dedication. I never got the impression that RA wants to be in one with the same intensity that he has for acting. I also get the feeling that away from the cameras RA is a loner and sharing your space is not an easy thing for a loner to do. As one gets older it becomes harder to do. I am sure that deep down RA would love to fall in love and get married, but with him being a loner it may be challenging. I would love for RA to find his special love and take all that energy and focus that he puts into acting and turn it towards that special woman.

  23. says

    Hi Xenia,
    Maybe he’s just single for the time being….? I remember reading in an article that he’d had a live-in girlfriend and that she later moved out…so its possible that he’s just casually dating and he’s not in anything serious. He likes curvy women, which is refreshing!

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